CHILD 1

Julio Urbina

CHLD 1

 MW 4-6:50PM

Article #1

Are Any Lies Good For Children?

SUMMARY

            The article Lies We Tell Our Children by Rhiana Maldenberg is about a wife who is a mom that tells her children white lies. White lies are known to society as innocent lies to protect or avoid the truth for two reasons. The first reason is to protect the individual in most cases kids from information they are not ready to know, and the second reason is the person wants to avoid searching the truth because it makes him or her uncomfortable. She believes lying to her kids is for their own benefit, and bending the truth is not lying. Although that is what lying is.

            Rhiana has six main reasons for lying to her kids; which are, to save time, because she does not know the answer for something, she believes it is easier than telling the truth, to be nice, to keep the innocence of her children, and to protect herself. Rhiana knows lying to her children is wrong and does it anyways for her own convenience, but she does not advocate dishonest parenting.

REACTION

            I strongly disagree with Rhiana because children learn habits from their family. If she keeps lying to them, then her children will think is okay to lie. This is an unacceptable behavior will get her kids in trouble at school and the future. Kids should always know the truth, only in a different way determined by their ages. The older the child, the more capable he or she is able to control the emotions after a big news. For example; good parents would tell a five year old his or her grandmother went to heaven and she is having a good time, and a ten year old that his or her grandmother passed away and she is no longer with them.

            Coming for a family with strong values; such as, following the rules will help you stay away from trouble, love is the main ingredient for a person’s happiness, there is no reason to be dishonest, and family should always be there to help you through tough times, has helped me build solid characters, preparing me for adulthood. As a young adult, I know lies are dishonest and will only benefit me at the moment but not long term. I know this thank to my parents and their honesty.  

ECOLOGICAL SYSTEM

            The ecological system the article Lies We Tell Our Children falls in according to, Child, Family, School, Community, by Roberta Berns is microsystem in the setting of a family. Microsystem means the activities and relationships with significant others experienced by developing person in a particular small setting such as family, school peer group, or community. The family is the primary socializer of the child on that is has the most significant impact on the child’s development.

            Kids will pick up parents behaviors and repeat them outside the house. Rhiana’s lesson as a mom to her kids is lies are good when they get you out of something you do not want to deal with. This could create a negative chain reaction for her kids; for example, her daughter goes to school and lies to the teacher that she didn’t do her homework because her mom was abusive. Obviously this will get the mother in huge problems with the school and police officers, but the daughter did it because she learned it from her mother. The purpose to be a good role model which Rhiana is not, is so kids would grow up to be honest people who have good morals and ready to help others.

FAMILY

            My opinion in the short term is her mom will solve things at the moment but not in the long run. It is true Rhiana is would avoid a question her kids would ask her with a “white lie”. She thinks by holding back and keeping her kids from important information will keep them innocent and pure. I am not going against the idea that any parent would not want to keep their kids pure and innocent, but I’m going against the idea of lies because it would not prepare the child to go out to the real world.

            After a long time of this habit of white lies, the kids will start to lie to their parents. This is dangerous because if they lie and get in trouble or injure themselves, their parents won’t be able to help them because they would not know where their children are. All this will be because the mom did not trust her kids would be mature enough to handle information. Rhiana should never lie to her kids, instead tell them a little of the true depending on their age. For example, if a little girl asks her mom where do kids come from, the mother should answer “kids come from when grownups love each other and decide to have love to make a kid.”, but if a teenager would ask the same question, the mother could answer “babies come from two responsible adults who decide to have intercourse, so they could start a family.”